The answer is, of course, I guess . . .

To wedding, or not to wedding?

That's quite a big question.

You see, I really didn't really think that particular question through, cause, well, I had no intention, at all of even considering it.

The answer is No.

Absolutely not.


Bad form.

I'm not against marriage. Far be it. I myself am twice the man I used to be, back when I was half a man.

Or something like that.

But first off, I don't know any wedding songs.

There's not a single song I do, originals, covers, that is in any way wedding appropriate.

Maybe "Sit By Me" That's kind of a lovely tune, but it's short, and the first verse already repeats itself twice, there is no stretching to be done.

Yes, of course, the money can be good. Better than any nightclub gig, and ten times what I've been scraping by at showcases.

And I have nothing against prostitution as a valid form of professionalism.

I have dreams, not high moral standards.

But weddings are like one horror story after another. And I just don't think I would ever want to be in a situation where I've played a part in ruining someone's magical day.

That, and I just don't know any love songs.

I just don't.

And I don't know any dance tunes.

And I'm not a DJ.

And I don't like disco.

Or old people dancing to disco.

Or old people.

But even though it doesn't look like it, summer is just right around the corner, and I am trying to book heavy on the outdoor winery venues where I can peddle my wares to people who don't mind spending money on things and who are just a little drunk.

I'd love to play a show where I could wear a tie and not have it look ironic.

But if I'm going to be playing in that particular ball park, I'm gonna be asked if I can do weddings.

Cause, well, those are the kinds of gigs that happen in those places during that season.

So now I have to ask myself:

Do I?

Could I?

Should I?

Would it hurt if I did?

Would I do it if it sustained me another six months?

Would I do it if it kept me out of retail for at least one more holiday season?

I obviously don't have any street cred to lose.

And how many songs would I have to learn? 20? 30?

I could conceivably do that before June.

And I could learn special songs for that special couple.

And, I'm not a band or a DJ, so the kinds of weddings that would have old people dancing to disco wouldn't call me back anyway.

What do you say when the answer is unequivocally "No"?

But every reason for saying no is, well, no reason at all.

And the reasons for saying yes include both food and money.

And food.

Now last week's absurd becomes this weeks "To-Do"

So the answer, of course, I guess, is "I Do"

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