The Super Oscar Bowl

Well, the Niners will not be going to the Super Bowl.

If you doubt me, then spend three minutes surfing your Facebook feed.

So the Super Bowl will be played by the Denver Broncos and the Seatle Seahawks.

Which is great and all, but leaves me no one to root for. Cause even though I absolutely love visiting both cities, they'd be my top five in the nation, I don't like either football team. Screw Papa John's and the 12th Man.

Which sucks cause the Super Bowl to me is like the second coming of Thanksgiving. Food, Family, Football.

What equally sucks is that the Oscar nominations just came out with nine, count 'em, nine flicks in the best movie category, Joann and I haven't seen a single one. Not one.

Which is ridiculous.

We're pop culture junkies, yet we have to scroll all the way down to the best sound editing category before we even have a favorite.


The Super Bowl and the Oscars are like my favorite American holidays. Nachos, and sliders, and fried cheese sticks and beer, and no one has to bring presents or pay special attention to the children.

But 2014 is going to be just a Meh year for both.


Yet, I've decided to take this as a good sign.

The universe is specifically telling Me (cause somehow I consider myself that important) it's telling me that the time for frivolity is not right this second. I need to take every ounce of energy and focus on my goals. I need to draft S.M.A.R.T. plans and consider all entrepreneurial angles, I need to be more dedicated to my body and my self esteem, I need to concentrate, be serious, be pragmatic, productive and profitable.

There is no room for hot wings when you've got an empire to build.

This isn't the time for friends and family and farting about.

This is about hustle, and no pain no gain, maximizing income, minimizing costs, I need to be more machine now than man.

I need to be Darth Vader.

Well, wait.

Maybe a guy who gets hacked to pieces by his best friend and then gets hacked to pieces again by his own son thirty years later shouldn't be considered my spirit animal.

And, lets kinda face it, the Super Bowl is really about the commercials, and the Oscars, well, they're really all about the dresses, and if the Universe tells you things, then it will only go so far as to tell you eat and to procreate.

This stage I'm at right now, with this grand experiment, this chasing of the proverbial dream, itsn't terribly hard, but it can be horribly depressing, and if there's anything I need right now, it's a little frivolity, a little food, a little procreation, a little nonsense to balance out the ridiculous.

In fact, I think I'm gonna skip tomorrow's email campaign and take my girl out to a movie.

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