Friday Five: Contacts

So I was emailing back and forth with a booking agent today and was asked whether or not I was a member of the local infamous Macrae Clan.

Not sure what was meant, so I quickly Googled "Macrae Clan Sacramento" and got nothing, so I immediately thought of my brother whose exploits around Sacramento border on the legendary. I told the agent I wasn't responsible for the past, but would clearly pay for any furniture that needs to be replaced in the future.

Turns out the agent was referring to John McRea, the lead singer of the band "Cake" which along with Tesla and Papa Roach is one of the few breakouts of the Sacramento music scene.

But the thought occurred to me that for someone who is going to claw his way to Rock and Roll Obscurity, I don't have any connections whatsoever.

"Yet", of course.

So since I have no direct connections, I started making a list of all the secondary and tertiary connections (I know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy), and since I'm not only a genealogy nerd but also viciously competitive when it comes to the Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon Game, my tertiary and quaternary connections started getting a little out of hand.

Now, be aware that this list is in no way exhaustive and does not include any of the connections I will be embarrassingly exploiting over the next few years and also doesn't include the kind of chance happening like the time I sat behind George Zimmer at a performance of Camelot or the time my Dad had to share the stage with a very coked out Eddie Money or the time my wife's best friend was hit on by D.B. Sweeny. I've got one two words: Toe Pick.

So here, for Friday, are Five of the Funnest Entertainment Industry Wait . . . Dad? Connections:

1. I have an uncle who knows the collectables dealer who was the model for "Comic Book Guy" on the Simpsons.
Since one of my life's goals is to compose the saxophone solo on the opening credits, I'd say I'm just that much closer to completing my bucket list.

2. My mother grew up with the guy who is director of photography on the reboot of Beverly Hills 90210.
He offered once to help me get my SAG card back when I was pretty enough to be an actor. I wished so desperately to be Luke Perry, but back then I was more Brian Austin Green. And I was stupid not to go for it, but of course then I was a STAGE ACTOR Queens English lilt and everything. But at least I get to crash Mom's house when she spends Thanksgiving in Catalina.

3. My step mom's brother was married to Joan Baez's sister.
This one is especially nifty considering that my first band out of high school was an acoustic rock band that did slow covers of punk tunes and we toyed once with calling ourselves Bone Jaez. Creepy huh?

4. My dad once had a booking agent that is the mother of the bass player for Papa Roach (The Sacramento Band mentioned earlier).
This is not my only connection to that band. The singer who first recorded my songs professionally is not only a good friend of mine, but was a high school chum of their lead singer. My best friend in high school almost become their drummer, and I opened up for them once at a kegger and they might still remember me as the guy who played terrible Beatles songs with a copy of a porno playing on the TV behind me. It's the details in life.

5. One of my Acting Instructors baby-sat for Tom Hanks.
Which means I am exactly three phone numbers away from being able to text Peter Scolari.

I could go on and on (because that's what I do), but Calvin is waiting for me to go to the store and pick up string beans which is what he requested for dinner.

And when your child requests string beans its time to give up your silly lists and go get string beans.